direction and rejection

For me, there are endless ways to get there. I tell myself all the time when considering a project in the works. These things take time and sometimes its better to staple it to the wall and walk away. One day, as I sat in a silly gazebo in the center of a town peddling what I call "art", a woman walked up into the gazebo, looked around and said... "I heard that there was supposed to be an artist here today." I spoke up that I was the artist and pointed out some of my works. She made some comment akin to how small my pieces were and stomped off... as though I were not a true artist... and actually that day I had sold a lot more than in the past. She left after shredding me to dust... even though that day I had sold more pieces than I have before or since... that comment hit me in the gut. Some days you question why you ever bother at all... and yet another show... I was much younger and less sure of myself and yet again peddling my little drawings... when another woman took one look at my pieces and called them "evil" and walked away. At the time I thought it was cool... kinda interesting to get that reaction but as I got older it ate away at the periphery of my confidence. At the time I laughed it off... years later I didn't find myself laughing so much. I have to find an audience that I know is never there... it drains my energy and kills my will.... however lately I'm daring to turn it on it's head. I want to escape further into the creative process. So suddenly I'm thinking myself into art. I'm convincing myself I can do it regardless of my size or subject. I've peeled away a lot of the negativity that hampered my progression. So here it is. Another day... an entirely new direction.

angel

Angel came to me whilst I was in a very dark mindset. I kept thinking that perhaps I was going to be down for a long time and so the marination began. Emotions sink into the psyche and out the hand comes a wellspring of sorrow. These angels began a few months back in my attempt to bring acceptable and recognizable imagery into my works. It's not that I had aim to please, it was more for charity. And I wanted the work to reflect what people would feel comfortable with besides monsters, chimeras, fantastical plantlife, etc. My creativity takes hold and sometimes I'm in a world so fargone that people are left scratching their heads when I dare to give them a peak. No she's not this particular angel. This one hangs on my mum's wall. Finished as it not is here. But she is part of a triquetra of angelic images. Each alone. I admit that most my pieces these days are very lonely. Perhaps they reflect my feelings for the bleached stone gray skies of late winter. I sometimes wish to disappear into the gray mist, then other days I wish to dance in the sun.

the crew

people affect art on different levels. People will inform a piece. A conversation or a persona can inspire the very ink to flow... the paint to collide. I was inspired by many people in my art adventures and even incorporated them into the piece. This is not about me because I don't feel the insides are truly owned. The spirit is constant and everywhere and can encompass many things. Family and friends will see you for who you are, not who you see. Sometimes we are incredibly critical of ourselves. It is wonderful to have the support and care from those who love you.

timepiece

I enjoy working through various themes from the past whether they are sparked from book reading or personal experiences. Art can create an atmosphere for real escape and so it makes sense to escape into a time or place one loves. A lot of people find comfort in recreating a different country or replacating the feel of a place. My own inner snapshots provide a lot of resources when considering what I want to do. I take images from life or reading or film and internalize the image and idea for use at a later date. I enjoy the overall feel of a piece of art but it does come from one thing or another.

textures

Textures are a huge part of my art adventures. I am consumed by simple textures at times and then other times I'm driven to craziness by complicated webs or ripple effects. I am sure I am not the first to find these things entrancing. Textures can really set off your image or your background, whatever area of a piece of artwork you are trying to explode. I use "explode" as meaning set off from everything else. I love art that explodes. I am drawn to artist Marc Chagall for this very reason. His use of color creates a kind of crazy web or texture throughout his pieces. I could find stories hidden under every brush stroke if I had the opportunity. Pen and ink artists use texture very differently. Chiaroscuro (sp?) dark and light. Or cross-hatching with the pen. Moving the pen horizontally and then vertically and then not so horizontally and not so vertically and moving it moving it until you are caught in webs of crazy ink. I like the intricate lines used by one of my favorite artists Albrecht Durer. His use of texture makes me eek out loud. Sometimes they can be stark and other times very warm and inviting.

Textures can be found all around us and can inspire use of them superimposed on other images or objects we wish to conjure. A mad map of texture would love my walls for sure.

the round canvas

Canvas (traditional stretch) comes in many different sizes and shapes. Recently I acquired a round canvas with some other art materials and have discovered that canvas shape and size affects what image I will want to use, the design and also the materials for the piece. I am not always patient with regard to the development of a piece and I find that patience is worth the wait. The planning stage of a piece of artwork should begin with various sketches and reworks. As with writing, there may be many different versions of the same piece. John William Waterhouse's Mermaid seems to have undergone a few different versions before reaching it's vision.

tattoo in blue

I have found that my commitment to art has been up in the air at times. Tattoos are interesting artforms that require a huge commitment on the part of the wearer and the artist. Your body becomes a permanent canvas. I never made the decision to get a tattoo however I have seen some amazing stuff. I had an idea for a spiritual compass of sorts for my skin but never was able to follow through. My sister is a huge tattoo fan and did a little painting of my own for me on my arm. Once I saw the size (size is important when considering a tattoo) I was certain I wouldn't want it on my skin permanently. For a tattooist to get all of the details they normally like to create larger pieces. My hope is that I can find such an artist who can work on a smaller scale so that I can get the effect of ink I have in mind.

searching for spark

there are many respectable mediums to use when planning a piece. I prefer to consider that everything is a possible material and from that attitude, I have come up with some fun stuff. Recycling objects into art is nothing new however it is always fun to find your own way of using different objects. I had a massive amount of catalogs lying about and used them in a show. I called it Recycled Spirit and all of the pieces were created out of the catalogs. And taking this attitude to the extreme I began to use human bodies, in particular, faces as canvas for my outdoor adventures in photography. It is important to remember everything is a material. Sounds simple but if you look around you will find that suddenly art and the creative process becomes endless. I can not help myself. I have found the most mundane objects engrossing. In this way we are able to vivify the art and bring it home in a unique way.

works for 2010 the nameless unless you meet her

I want to introduce the beginning of what I call works for 2010. I am currently working on a catalog and portfolio. All previous works will be collected and various stories written for the benefit of the piece.

down and done

Sometimes it is hard to see around the immediate and focus on the task at hand. I find that when I encounter a block, particularly in relation to creativity, it is best to work from inside what I like and "flip it" in my mind. Sometimes I am rather lazy when it comes to my approach and I have a lot of techniques still to learn. I have made the decision that this is something I like to do for myself. I am not competing for a prize. I am not worrying about how it appears to others. I am out to have some fun and adventure through art. That is my only concern. And I guess I would like to see how far I can get with regard to my skill level. I have seen phenomenal work that has blown me away. I know I am not that person but I like to think I come at it with some honest motivation. I want to work and when it becomes a consuming thing, to sit and work, you know you are hooked. There are many hours and days to work on how I can bring certain visions to reality. For now the investigation of materials and subject is my goal. This is something I have done for a very long time and the difference between the then and the now is huge. If you feel you can not do something... try it anyway. I like to think that art expression is a part of all people. And some will say I am a big sap... so be it. In love with Jasper Johns "Target with Four Faces"... I think that's it's name.

the Serpent

From the beginning of certain works I have come with the idea that specific images will conjure specific thoughts from people. In my self-schooling, I have found that the serpent is an interesting subject from Christianity and from the studies of ancient Egypt. I have chosen the serpent to represent my first 2010 work. The work itself is less that of an actual serpent and is more abstract in it's dealing of it. The central image is a mermaid. The object is to create a home for the central character and expand on this image. Photo of the home & hearth witch... creating her hearth, coming to terms with her home.

works for 2010

This year I have suffered a creative drought until this weekend. Last year was rough on me for several reasons and the roughness affected my ability to access my private portals of creativity and allow the flow of emotions. I have often thought I would write about the process for the entertainment and possible helpfulness to others however I have decided this may not be the wisest decision for a struggling artist and writer such as myself. I am taking the advice of a beloved author. I am protecting my ideas. This does not mean I can not share some of what I experience through the creative process and through life. Both can be trying at times however it is through the perseverence that we ultimately prevail in our vision and also in ourselves.